Lusty gets a case of The Nerves

Bad, bad me. I've been off pursuing other Very Important Things* instead of maintaining this blog.

I also haven't had business since the Unexpected Hottie that I mentioned in this post. And he is the one about whom I wish to write.

Unexpected Hottie (Whew, that's quite long. Let's call him UH.) posted a short ad requesting that a busty girl to give him a massage and a happy ending of the oral variety. Heartened by the fact that I am indeed quite busty and that he listed himself in very close proximity to my home, I answered the ad at about midnight. He wrote back quickly expressing his interest and gave me his number to call, which I did.

UH: Hello?
Me: Hi, it's Lusty. You posted an ad in craigslist?
UH: Yes, hi Lusty. So, tell me what you're all about.
Me: I'm sorry, what?
UH: You know, what you're into.
Me: [Stumbling badly over the unexpected question, giving him a few vague answers about what "I'm about."]
UH: Cool, I'm at work on the second floor of X building.

I hung up the phone after getting directions and quickly finished primping. I hopped into the car and arrived at his workplace, a two story square brick building in a strip mall on a major road. The bottom floor was occupied by a popular mattress store whose jingle never fails to stick in my head whenever I see its logo. He worked on the top floor for a startup computer repair company. Actually, he owned it. I walked into the high-ceilinged, wide-windowed modern space and rounded the corner to see a handsome caramel colored 20-something with his flip-flopped feet propped up onto a wide computer desk. His laptop was in his lap and he wore gray tracksuit pants and a t-shirt. As his name suggests, UH was hot. And that made me nervous.

I greeted him hello and we chatted for a few minutes. UH's company touts themselves as a 24 hour repair service, so it was already 1:00 a.m., but UH was slated for an all-nighter. He came off as extremely laid back and didn't seem super eager or nervous or sketchy like some of the other men I see who come off as jonesing badly for pussy. I asked him a little bit about his budding business and even gave him a few decorating tips that he seemed to like.

Pulling the massage oil out of my bag, I asked UH if he wanted a massage. He seemed almost surprised and said sure. I felt self-conscious for a moment, wondering whether or not I was supposed to skip the massage and get straight to the blowjob. But since he had already laid an hour's worth of cash out on the table, I figured that I would give him a massage anyway. He took off his shirt and laid down on the clean wooden floor. I straddled him by sitting on his ass and began to massage him. Although I'm not a certified body worker in any sort of way, I still pride myself on giving a pretty damn good massage and UH seemed to agree. We chatted some of the time, a large portion of the conversation consisting of me asking about his business and hinting around the fact that I needed a new computer. The rest of the massage was spent in silence. After my back began to ache from the hunching, I asked him to turn over and inquired about whether or not he wanted a massage on his legs or feet. How about between my legs and feet?, he asked. To the point, I thought, and grinned. He asked me if I was shy and I lied and said no because shyness doesn't seem to be an asset in this business.

At this point, I began to get more nervous about whether or not he was going to enjoy it and whether or not he'd become a repeat customer. Normally, I don't care about such things, but the prospect of having a cute and handsome repeat customer seemed like hooker gold to me. The minute details of the blowjob I don't remember much of except for the fact that he sucked hard on my nipples and liked it when I had both balls in my mouth. The actual sucking took maybe about 10 minutes and I let him come on my tits, though most of it landed on the hair on his stomach.

Normally, I stay for a moment and faux-cuddle with the client post orgasm, but because I am the kind who gets nervous around attractive people, I immediately jumped up and put on my clothes. But I didn't want to go. I asked UH if he wanted me to stay for the rest of the hour and he answered indifferently. I stayed.

I heard The Faint come on his stereo and I mentioned that I liked them. That led into a 20 minute discussion about music, mostly electroclash and other indie stuff. We found that we had very similar tastes in music, which clearly pleased us both. I tried to casually suggest that we barter for a new computer, but UH didn't seem too eager to trade sex for expensive electronics. I changed the subject and asked UH if he had a girlfriend. He answered that his work was his partner. He also mentioned never having solicited a sex worker before. After I expressed surprise, he told me that it was nice, but that he considered paying for sex "cheating." I like the chase, he explained. I understood.

Finally, I made an excuse to go and got up from my chair. I pushed into my heels and walked to the door, UH trailing behind me. We hugged goodnight and I told him to get some rest if he could. I drove the two miles home and decided that I probably wouldn't hear from him again. I still haven't.


*Surfing the interweb