I'd rather be working

So here's the update. I haven't worked since I injured my back (for obvious reasons) a weekish ago, but now I'm completely and totally broke and have no choice. Like, I need to make $1000 in the next week or so or else I can't pay my bills. Part of that is due to the fact that the unemployment office in this city is decidedly, well, stingy.

This is all also complicated by the fact that I'm leaving tomorrow night for my parents' house and won't be back until Saturday. Fret, fret fret.

I've been trolling the craigslist erotic services section, naturally, but it's so freaking hard to find clients when you're only answering ads. I'm REALLY paranoid about attracting LE (Law Enforcement) that way, so I continue to agonize over whether putting up an ad on craigslist or another escort lister like Eros is worth it.

If I do decide to do it (which I probably eventually will) I came up with the way to advertise myself. The headline will read (in all caps, because that's how they all seem to do it on craigslist): EVER DREAM OF A SUICIDE GIRL WITH MEAT ON HER BONES? Before you spit out your beverage, let me assure you that I hate the Suicide Girls industry as much as the any other person with a politicized brain. But hear me out. You see, the city in which I live is an extremely button-down city. Wait, let me rephrase that. People in this city who can afford escorts are, for the most part, button-down dudez a.k.a. White Guys in Ties. And I have a few qualities (piercings, busty, biracial) that make me "exotic." I could capitalize on the biracial thing, but I have a feeling that dudez looking for some sort of Asian girl would expect a skinny one. By capitalizing on the plus sized and pierced angle, I think I could carve myself out a real niche in this city.


Tonight I found a client that I'll hopefully be seeing on Saturday. He was really sweet and fell all over himself in his email telling me how hot I am and how much he can't wait to see me. I noticed something curious right away, however. Most clients, like most escorts, create a separate email address with which to conduct their naughty business. Mr. Compliments, though, used his work email!

Of course, I went straight to his work website and found out in fairly short order that Mr. Compliments is Senior VP for a big consulting firm in the city. After reading his bio, I was even more stunned to find out that he does tech stuff. I mean seriously, wha??? Even the least tech savvy client in the world knows not to solicit prostitution over work email! After reading even more of his bio, however, I was even more amused to find that Mr. Compliments adjuncts at my alma matter!

The question at hand: will it feel more like shadenfraude or sheer evil delight when I pee in his mouth and then make him lick my asshole?


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